<?xml version='1.0' encoding='UTF-8'?><rss xmlns:atom='http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom' xmlns:openSearch='http://a9.com/-/spec/opensearchrss/1.0/' version='2.0'><channel><atom:id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-239615725078477956</atom:id><lastBuildDate>Wed, 30 Jul 2008 22:30:10 +0000</lastBuildDate><title>Touching Stories</title><description/><link>http://www.demnos.com/blogs/stories/index.htm</link><managingEditor>noreply@blogger.com (Demnos)</managingEditor><generator>Blogger</generator><openSearch:totalResults>11</openSearch:totalResults><openSearch:startIndex>1</openSearch:startIndex><openSearch:itemsPerPage>25</openSearch:itemsPerPage><item><guid isPermaLink='false'>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-239615725078477956.post-4103751445121960160</guid><pubDate>Tue, 10 Jun 2008 19:51:00 +0000</pubDate><atom:updated>2008-06-10T14:53:56.241-05:00</atom:updated><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>serious</category><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>touching</category><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>religion</category><title>Don't leave it on the desk</title><atom:summary type='text'>This is a good one.  There's a good chance it's not true and that it's all just made up but I think it's still a cool story.

******************

There was a certain Professor of Religion named Dr. Christianson, a studious man who taught at a small college in the western United States.  Dr. Christianson taught the required survey course in Christianity at this particular institution.  Every </atom:summary><link>http://www.demnos.com/blogs/stories/2008/06/this-is-good-one.htm</link><author>noreply@blogger.com (Demnos)</author></item><item><guid isPermaLink='false'>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-239615725078477956.post-3687875370573167267</guid><pubDate>Mon, 11 Feb 2008 20:29:00 +0000</pubDate><atom:updated>2008-02-11T15:31:22.692-05:00</atom:updated><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>serious</category><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>life</category><title>Charles Schultz Philosophy</title><atom:summary type='text'>The following is the philosophy of Charles Schultz, the creator of the 'Peanuts' comic strip. You don't have to actually answer the questions. Just read the email straight through, and you'll get the point.

1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.

2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.

3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America.

4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel </atom:summary><link>http://www.demnos.com/blogs/stories/2008/02/charles-schultz-philosophy.htm</link><author>noreply@blogger.com (Demnos)</author></item><item><guid isPermaLink='false'>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-239615725078477956.post-105411814679471614</guid><pubDate>Fri, 25 May 2007 16:12:00 +0000</pubDate><atom:updated>2007-05-25T11:15:34.801-05:00</atom:updated><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>seniors</category><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>funny</category><title>Write it down!</title><atom:summary type='text'>A couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, the doctor tells them that they're physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember

Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. "Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?" he asks.

"Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?"

"Sure."

"Don't you </atom:summary><link>http://www.demnos.com/blogs/stories/2007/05/write-it-down.htm</link><author>noreply@blogger.com (Demnos)</author></item><item><guid isPermaLink='false'>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-239615725078477956.post-3037833596679796827</guid><pubDate>Fri, 25 May 2007 16:04:00 +0000</pubDate><atom:updated>2007-05-25T11:10:41.685-05:00</atom:updated><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>seniors</category><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>funny</category><title>Elderly Couple</title><atom:summary type='text'>An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.

The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, "Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly."


The other man said, "What is the name of the restaurant?"

The first man thought and thought and finally said, "What is </atom:summary><link>http://www.demnos.com/blogs/stories/2007/05/elderly-couple-had-dinner-at-another.htm</link><author>noreply@blogger.com (Demnos)</author></item><item><guid isPermaLink='false'>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-239615725078477956.post-6345495290336673648</guid><pubDate>Tue, 15 May 2007 13:01:00 +0000</pubDate><atom:updated>2007-05-15T08:02:18.233-05:00</atom:updated><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>humor</category><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>funny</category><title>Should we add this math test to our applications?</title><atom:summary type='text'>An Italian man wants a job, but the foreman won't hire him until he passes a little math test. "Here's your first question," the foreman said. "Without using numbers, represent the number 9."
"Without numbers?" the Italian says, "Datsa easy." and he proceeds to draw three trees.
"What's this?" the boss asks.
"Ave you got no brain? Tree and tree and tree makea nine," says the Italian.
"Fair enough</atom:summary><link>http://www.demnos.com/blogs/stories/2007/05/should-we-add-this-math-test-to-our.htm</link><author>noreply@blogger.com (Demnos)</author></item><item><guid isPermaLink='false'>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-239615725078477956.post-9035655573826948469</guid><pubDate>Mon, 19 Mar 2007 14:30:00 +0000</pubDate><atom:updated>2007-03-19T09:31:16.238-05:00</atom:updated><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>humor</category><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>funny</category><title>The Atheist in the Woods</title><atom:summary type='text'>An atheist was taking a walk through the woods. "What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!" he said to himself. As he continued walking he heard a rustling in the bushes and saw a 7 foot grizzly charging towards him. He ran as fast as he could but tripped and fell on the ground.  He saw the bear raising his paw to take a swipe at him. At that instant the atheist cried out</atom:summary><link>http://www.demnos.com/blogs/stories/2007/03/atheist-in-woods.htm</link><author>noreply@blogger.com (Demnos)</author></item><item><guid isPermaLink='false'>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-239615725078477956.post-3646515030096594258</guid><pubDate>Wed, 14 Mar 2007 13:13:00 +0000</pubDate><atom:updated>2007-03-14T08:18:45.451-05:00</atom:updated><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>serious</category><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>touching</category><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>baby</category><title>Baby Thoughts</title><atom:summary type='text'>This is a hard one but definitely one worth reading.  Thanks for sending me this one Tammy.

Month One:
Mommy, I am only 8 inches long, but I have all my organs. I love the sound of your voice. Every time I hear it, I wave my arms and legs. The sound of your heart beat is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two:
Mommy, today I learned how to suck my thumb. If you could see me, you could definitely tell </atom:summary><link>http://www.demnos.com/blogs/stories/2007/03/baby-thoughts.htm</link><author>noreply@blogger.com (Demnos)</author></item><item><guid isPermaLink='false'>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-239615725078477956.post-2562753670484654528</guid><pubDate>Sat, 10 Mar 2007 22:29:00 +0000</pubDate><atom:updated>2007-03-10T17:30:00.336-05:00</atom:updated><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>kids</category><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>funny</category><title>Daddy's Gonna Eat Your Fingers...</title><atom:summary type='text'>I was packing for my business trip and my three year old daughter was having a wonderful time playing on the bed. At one point she said, "Daddy, look at this," and stuck out two of her fingers.

Trying to keep her entertained, I reached out and stuck her tiny fingers in my mouth and said, "Daddy's gonna eat your fingers," pretending to eat them. Went back to packing, looked up again and my </atom:summary><link>http://www.demnos.com/blogs/stories/2007/03/daddys-gonna-eat-your-fingers.htm</link><author>noreply@blogger.com (Demnos)</author></item><item><guid isPermaLink='false'>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-239615725078477956.post-7464186248909159718</guid><pubDate>Sun, 04 Mar 2007 02:07:00 +0000</pubDate><atom:updated>2007-03-03T21:12:57.253-05:00</atom:updated><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>humor</category><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>funny</category><title>Git-r-dun</title><atom:summary type='text'>"Hello, is this the Sheriff's office?"

"Yes. How can I help you?"

"I'm calling to report about my neighbor, Virgil. He's hidin' marijuana inside his firewood! Don't quite know how he gets it inside them logs, but he's hidin' it there."

"Thank you for the call, sir."

The following day, the Sheriff's deputies descended on Virgil's house. They searched the shed where the firewood was kept. Using</atom:summary><link>http://www.demnos.com/blogs/stories/2007/03/git-r-dun.htm</link><author>noreply@blogger.com (Demnos)</author></item><item><guid isPermaLink='false'>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-239615725078477956.post-7295257840300661688</guid><pubDate>Wed, 28 Feb 2007 21:33:00 +0000</pubDate><atom:updated>2007-03-14T08:16:47.118-05:00</atom:updated><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>life</category><category domain='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#'>funny</category><title>Life</title><atom:summary type='text'>On the first day, God created the dog and said:

"Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a lifespan of twenty years."

The dog said: "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said:

"Entertain people, do </atom:summary><link>http://www.demnos.com/blogs/stories/2007/02/life.htm</link><author>noreply@blogger.com (Demnos)</author></item><item><guid isPermaLink='false'>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-239615725078477956.post-6859918216748279407</guid><pubDate>Mon, 11 Dec 2006 19:21:00 +0000</pubDate><atom:updated>2006-12-11T14:25:30.636-05:00</atom:updated><title>The Heart</title><atom:summary type='text'>"Tomorrow morning," the surgeon began, "I'll open up your heart..."

"You'll find Jesus there," the boy interrupted.

The surgeon looked up, annoyed "I'll cut your heart open," he continued, to see how much damage has been done...";

"But when you open up my heart, you'll find Jesus in there," said the boy.

The surgeon looked to the parents, who sat quietly. "When I see how much damage has been </atom:summary><link>http://www.demnos.com/blogs/stories/2006/12/heart.htm</link><author>noreply@blogger.com (Demnos)</author></item></channel></rss>